In Episode 15 of Erovenus Sexopedia, host Sarah interviews tantra practitioner and mindful sexuality expert Yella to dive deep into the world of slow sex. In this enlightening conversation, Yella sheds light on how slowing down during sex can transform intimacy, aid in healing, and lead to a deeper connection with oneself and a partner. This episode explores how slow sex and tantric practices can help heal sexual trauma, redefine the orgasm, and nourish other areas of our lives.
Table of Contents
What is Slow Sex?
The concept of slow sex might seem counterintuitive in a world where instant gratification is often the norm. However, Yella explains that slow sex is not just about taking your time—it’s about intentionally focusing on the present moment, deepening communication, and creating a space for exploration. Rather than rushing toward orgasm or focusing on performance, slow sex invites individuals to be fully present with their bodies, their emotions, and their partners.
"Sex is an exploration," says Yella, emphasizing that the goal is to engage in a shared experience where both partners are actively involved in discovering what feels good, safe, and nourishing. Instead of making sex a task or something that needs to be completed quickly, slow sex is about enjoying the process, just like taking a journey to an unknown destination, where the true joy lies in the experience itself.
Healing Through Presence: Slow Sex and Trauma
One of the most profound aspects of slow sex is its potential to help individuals heal from sexual trauma. In the podcast, Yella explains that trauma doesn’t always come from major life events but can stem from smaller, unresolved experiences. These unresolved traumas create emotional blockages that impact how we experience intimacy later in life. When sex is rushed, these blockages can remain, preventing full emotional and physical connection.
Yella shares how tantric practices, which often form the foundation of slow sex, encourage being present in the moment. This presence allows energy to flow more freely through the body, which helps individuals process and release past traumas. Slow sex can be deeply therapeutic because it creates an environment where past experiences can be felt and digested, providing a chance for healing.
"The idea in tantric sexuality is to get to a free flow of energy, as present as possible," Yella explains. Allowing space for energy to move through the body without rushing toward an endpoint can unravel old patterns, giving way to a more open, connected experience. This is especially important for those who may carry unprocessed trauma or emotional wounds.
Orgasm: A New Perspective
One of the most intriguing aspects of slow sex discussed in the podcast is its approach to orgasm. While traditional sex often revolves around the goal of reaching a peak experience, slow sex redefines orgasm as a holistic, full-body experience that isn’t limited to just genital pleasure. Yella describes the difference as moving away from quick, shallow orgasms toward what is known as a "valley orgasm."
A valley orgasm, as Yella explains, is an orgasmic experience that flows like waves through the entire body, rather than a sharp, immediate peak. "It’s not just genital," says Yella. "It’s more like an ecstatic state where your body connects to something much larger." In slow sex, orgasm becomes more of a journey than a destination. The body learns to circulate sexual energy in a way that enhances overall vitality, leading to longer, more intense orgasms that are experienced throughout the whole body.
The idea behind slow sex is not that orgasm should be avoided but that it should not be the driving force. Instead, being present in the experience allows energy to build naturally, leading to a deeper, more fulfilling climax when it happens. This experience isn’t about striving for perfection but rather about enjoying the journey and seeing where it takes you.
Slow Sex as a Way to Nourish Life
Beyond the bedroom, slow sex offers a way to nourish your entire life. In the interview, Yella points out that sexual energy is often considered the most potent form of energy we can create ourselves. When approached mindfully, slow sex can channel this energy into all aspects of life. It’s not just about physical pleasure—it’s about harnessing energy to improve creativity, work, and overall well-being.
Research shows that individuals who have fulfilling, regular sex tend to be more successful in their careers and experience greater happiness. By practicing slow sex, individuals can access this life force, boosting their energy levels, motivation, and even their ability to navigate challenges more effectively.
"Sexuality is a skill you can learn," Yella says, pointing out that slow sex provides a way to tap into this powerful energy. As Sarah notes in the podcast, the process of learning and exploring is key to discovering what works best for you, as slow sex can help not only in your intimate life but also in boosting your energy and connection to the world around you.
Conclusion: The Art of Exploring Together
In Episode 15 of Erovenus Sexopedia, Yella provides a refreshing perspective on sex that challenges the fast-paced, goal-oriented view of modern intimacy. Through slow sex, individuals and couples can explore deeper levels of connection, heal past trauma, and experience orgasm in a more profound way. But, as Yella emphasizes, it all comes down to learning to be present and embracing the exploration.
Sex is a skill, and slow sex offers a transformative path toward greater intimacy, connection, and personal growth. As Sarah reflects at the end of the interview, she feels inspired to explore this mindful approach to intimacy herself—encouraging listeners to give it a try and see how it can enrich not only their sex lives but their entire existence.
For more on slow sex, tantric practices, and mindful sexuality, check out the full conversation in LoveNestle Sexopedia, Episode 15， or visit lovebase.com to learn about slow sex or more from Yella.
With over five years of experience in the field, I have dedicated my career to providing valuable information and insights on sex health-related topics. In this document, I will share my expertise and knowledge on various aspects of sex health, aiming to educate and empower individuals in making informed decisions regarding their sexual well-being.
